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This is really on campus. It's just asking for an underachieving undergrad to jump.
Well I have finally made it home for Christmas and winter break, which means you will finally get some regular updates, as well as some new articles. We start off the bonanza of new content with a little helpful information for you heading to the Cornell game this evening, or perhaps just enjoying it from the comfort of home. This is everything you need to know about heckling Cornell.

First off, the main jeer that any good fan would rely on is of course a reference to the fact the City of Ithaca has gorges. A gorge, as defined by, is a narrow cleft with steep, rocky walls, especially one through which a stream runs or a small canyon. On the campus of Cornell University, which I have been to on more than a few occasions because my hometown is only 30 minutes from campus, are several bridges going across these gorges. Traditionally, during final examinations each semester, at least what I have always been told, is that they close down these bridges to pedestrian traffic to curb the desire for kids feeling the pressures of an Ivy League Institution to take one final jump. Without doing any fact checking, and relying on information I have heard since my high school days, Cornell/Ithaca, NY is the place with the highest suicide rate in New York State, with the Rochester Institute of Technology (RIT) following in second (this is mostly due to the aesthetically unappealing campus).

Therefore, the only logical conclusion is to yell things like “Go jump in a Gorge!” This is also a reference to shirts that are sold in the Ithaca Commons which read “Ithaca is Gorges!” A parody on the word gorgeous. Just awful. Really, you have an Ivy League school in your wheelhouse, and that is how creative you hippies got? Yet I digress. Yelling for someone to jump is a classic putdown, but it could have disastrous consequences, seemingly.

During the 2005-2006 season, myself and several of my friends had tickets in the student section (which is fun because I was not a student at the time. Pulling one over on the man… awesome! Thanks again for the ID Ben.). My friend John was on the aisle in Section 103 and he was yelling “Go jump in a Gorge!” among other things. A girl, who somehow ended up in the Syracuse Student Section, or could have even been an SU student tapped my friend on the arm and said “HEY! My friend died in a gorge. That’s not funny.” We were dumbfounded. Not only was Debbie Downer in the Dome, but frankly who cares? We are all there to have a good time and WTF dude. This all threw us for a loop and we still tell that story every time gorges are brought up. So use this jeer and use it often tonight.

A few years back, many Ivy League schools such as Harvard, Yale, Penn, and Dartmouth were implicated and investigated (by who I have no idea) for grade inflation. Cornell was also discussed. Therefore, I leave it up to you to creatively yell the issue in an entertaining and concise manner. My guess, after a bad shot yell something like “That would be a B at Cornell and a D+ at Syracuse”. Let your imagination guide you.

Finally, upon free throws, there is the classic after a player makes one free throw and misses another of yelling “50% is still failing”. Take it one step further. “Even at Cornell, 50% is still failing.” When you insult their academic reputation you insult their soul.

You can get pretty creative with this, as I am sure I will with my friends in the 309 luxury seats I have (I’m working on a press pass for a game over break in January). All and all it should be a good time, and baring any surprises, should be a nice game to watch and enjoy. Stay tuned for postgame coverage, where I will finally catch up and comment on this game, ETSU and Colgate in one mega awesome blog post. Until next time remember, they may yell that we will be pumping their gas someday, but you can always yell “Syracuse rejects!”

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1 Responses to “The Orange::44 Guide to Heckling: Cornell University Edition”

  1. # Blogger Brian Harrison

    I've also come to hear that chanting SUNY Ithaca is used, especially at Hockey Games. Apparently Cornell students are none too pleased about it.  

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